Our Little Man is Growing Up

So much has happened in the past several weeks and there is much more to come. Xander is getting ready to turn four weeks old on Monday and then he will be a month old on Thursday. It is incredible to me that nine months goes by so slowly and then once your little bundle is here you just want time to slow down. 

For Valentine's Day Brent and I had a somewhat peaceful dinner at home with Xander. We decided that since there is really nothing to do in Pinon that we would celebrate on Friday. We asked Emma and Tommy to watch Xander for the day and they were more than willing. Brent and I got up and headed out to Snowflake for the day, we decided to go to the temple. We left @ 6 AM and got there around 9:30 AM, which worked out perfect because we got distracted and lost like four times. While on the way to the temple I received a phone call from one of my jobs that I applied for recently requesting an interview. I was super excited about this phone call, it shows promise and that all of the applications are finally paying off. Brent and I went to a session together and then walked around the temple. We then headed over to a local restaurant and had a nice meal together. On the way out of town we picked up ice cream and headed back to Pinon. Friday was perfect and it was a much needed day off. Thank You Emma and Tommy!

That night Brent and I decided to hang out with Xander. Lately we have been having kitten problems. Hope is getting ready to get fixed but has decided he needs to claim his house by peeing everywhere. Brent and I decided that the only option we had was to lock him up in a separate cage whenever he starts peeing anywhere in the house. At first we thought it was Hope being jealous of Xander, but lately every time we sit down with Xander the kitten curls up right next to Xander and when Xander moves the kitten readjusts to be right next to him. I love all of my boys!

I am very proud of Brent. He was discussing with several ladies that we work with how much he helps me at home with Xander. The ladies were really impressed how much he helps me. Our instructional coach commented on how she barely can get her husband to help without kicking them. It is really appreciated, especially on days like today. Brent woke up when I got up to feed Xander, changed his diaper, and changed him into his Sunday best. We slept in a little late so Brent decided that him and Xander would venture to church together to priesthood. My handsome men.










Brent and I like to dress Xander up in a wide variety of clothes. We think our little boy is so cute and handsome and we like to show off his wonderful clothes.

"Nuts about Grandma"

Little Bear

Our adorable monkey

Three Weeks Old

A lot has happened in three weeks in our family. My mom flew home a week ago leaving Brent and me to discover parenthood on our own. Xander also had his two week follow-up with his doctor. The doctor was really excited that he had put 9.5 ounces back on and had grown 2 inches.

This week has been really rough. Xander hit a growth spurt and became really fussy. He has also discovered that daddy and mommy are suckers and when he cries we will come get him. Xander and I also experienced what life would be like without Brent, and let me tell you that it sucked. Brent had to travel to Prescott, AZ for the state wrestling tournament. After regionals last weekend he only had one student that qualified, but he took two so the student wasn't lonely. His student placed 4th in his weight class. Brent was gone from Wednesday-Saturday and finally got home around 11 AM. Brent basically got a mini vacation so when he got home I declared him Mr. Mom for an evening so mommy could get some sleep. Brent stayed up all night with Xander, did the 1 AM and 4 AM feedings and then passed out. I got some sleep but enjoyed watching and listening to Brent take care of Xander all night.

The next couple of weeks have a lot of excitement coming our way. I have two weeks off to myself with Xander and Brent. For Valentines Day Brent and I have decided to spend in the temple in Snowflake. Tommy and Emma are going to babysit for us. I am very excited to go to the temple with Brent. On February 24th my sister, Michelle, and nephew, Leland, will be flying into Flagstaff. We are going to spend the weekend in Flag so I can take care of some errands and get the kitten fixed. We are then going to come back and hang out in Pinon until Dad and Donna get here on Sunday or Monday. Everyone is going to stay until March 5th and then head back to Pinon. My father is SUPER excited to meet his grandson. He is so energetic that when we talk on the phone I understand nothing that he says.

Brent and I have decided to spend spring break in UT with his family. His parents tried so hard to come down and see their grandson but it seemed like there was something holding them back every time they turned around. They eventually decided to stay in UT to help Keith and Shawna with Luke and the girls. They only have to wait four more weeks to see Xander and by then he will be big and healthy and I think I will be freaking out a little less.

One Week Later

It has been one week since Xander entered into our lives, and what a week it has been. We spent all day Thursday shopping because who knew that I would deliver a baby under 8 pounds, so known of his clothes fit him. Xander, only being three days old, got a whole new wardrobe of newborn clothes. And even then we could still fit another baby into some of his outfits. We chose to stay in Flagstaff until Friday January 27th due to my health and Xander had his first appointment that day anyways. We went to his pediatrician who gave him his first exam and said that he was in perfect health. After Xander's appointment we headed to meet Emma at the airport because Tommy came out to Pinon for three weeks. We did a little shopping at Sam's Club and then started making the long drive home. We bundled Xander up and put him in his car seat.

For weeks Brent and I had been debating on how to drive home. The dirt roads have gotten really bad with all of the rain from the fall and Brent did not feel comfortable taking the roads with a new born baby. I wanted to take a dirt road home that has some bumps, but overall is pretty decent because it drives right past the mine and I figured that it would be the smoothest of them all. Brent won the first debate and I gave in to taking the six hour drive home. On our way home I started hurting from my stitches and Xander started getting restless. We decided to pull over at the Hopi Cultural Center for a bathroom break. I finally convinced Brent that if one of us sat in the backseat and held Xander's head we should be fine on the dirt roads. We took a dirt road home. Xander did really well on the dirt road and started to fuss the last five minutes because he was hungry. I knew he would be one tough baby (Brent, the wife is always right!)

During this past week Xander has defiantly captured our hearts and can get us to do whatever he wants when he wants it. Waking up at night has been rough, but both Brent and myself have established a baby routine making things so much easier. Xander has already grown so much, he is also very strong. After only one week he is trying to hold his head up and roll over. When he grips your finger he tightens his little fingers so hard that you have to pry them loose. We also find it very funny that our one week old son loves hand mittens, socks, and shoes. We put a frog outfit on him, shown in the picture, and then decided to put mittens on him. He left them on for about 12 hours and if you took them of her cried. 

On Sunday we went to church for the first time as a family. Everyone at church was amazed at how small he was. We were amazed at how well behaved he was. He did not cry once. When he started to fuss Brent scooted over immediately, rocked his car seat, and he stopped. I could feed him and burp him during sacrament without him crying once. Going to church as a family, and with my mom, was the happiest moment of the week for me. Brent was glowing with happiness and enjoyed showing off his new family. 

Brent had to go back to work on Monday, but was excited to show some of his pictures off to his students. I had to stop in to finish something up and the students were so excited to see me and pictures of the baby. After wrestling, Brent came immediately home, picked up Xander, and started reading a book to him. He told me that one of his goals is to come home after work everyday and have father son reading time. I am so impressed with Brent. He is an amazing father and Xander knows who he is my the sound of his voice. His eyes widen and he starts to smile when he hears Brent's voice. Brent is very supportive and caring. Xander and I are both so blessed to have such a wonderful person in our life. 

Xander Michael Paul Maynard

Well, this started out as Pam's personal blog, Halfway Around the World.  She used this blog and I had my own personal one called Out Here in Pinon.  We decided to start a family blog together.  It's only fitting therefore that our first blog together is about our first son, Xander.

Pam and I don't waste much time in life, a friend once said that we had crammed five years of life into a few months - that was back in 2010 before we were even married.  So you can imagine then how many years of life we've been living since then.  We were married on April 23rd 2011 and we have been living very happily together as man and wife.  Xander was born exactly nine months from our wedding date.

A lot has been going on in our lives.  We had a fantastic wedding and an incredible honeymoon.  Work as always has been a large part of our lives and perhaps the biggest stress factor in our lives.  Here are some snapshots of our family pre Xander.

On January 23rd at 5:15 pm Xander was born weighing in at 7 pounds 9 ounces and laying a whole 19 inches long.  His mother Pamela Maynard was induced that morning.  Things were progressing quickly.  So quickly that she was only in labor for four hours and wasn't given any pain meds, she did the birth completely naturally.  Pam has made it very clear that she will never ever do that again.  Everything happened so quickly that as far as I'm concerned they should just do the shot at the same time that they are inducing.

 Here he is only minutes after birth.  Not sure how he feels about the nurse quite yet from the look on his face.

 This is one of the first pictures of Pam's Mom holding dear Xander.  The two of them bonded instantly thanks to Xander's raspberries.  Xander has inherited his mother's tongue, much to Grandma Jane's delight.

 Emma Siddall was able to come and help out with the birth and was very good to have in our corner in our moment of need.  Thanks Emma.

 This picture is not of the first time I held Xander.  While people were helping Pam I was helping the Nurse with Xander.  This is however the first or one of the first pictures of me holding Xander.  This picture wasn't taken until a little later on the 23rd when things had calmed down a bit.

 Xander likes to be held but really isn't very picky of how.  He rested his head on my stomach while I read and played music for him on the kindle fire.  He was content.  I was content to be with my son and Pam got to sleep for awhile!

 Xander is a wonderful baby boy who likes to stick out his tongue and wiggle his fists.  He was extremely alert for most of the first few hours after being born.  He loves music.  Whenever Pam's classes were bad he would kick in the womb.  Now we play music for him and he makes it clear to us what he does and does not like.

Our burrito baby.  Because of his size and the way we've been wrapping him up that has become his nickname - Burrito Baby.  We love you Burrito Baby aka Xander.

A Questionable Vacation

For the past several months the only thing I could think about is going home to Ohio for Thanksgiving. This trip is what helped me get through the past several months of frustration at work, but now I do not know how I feel.

It is not that the trip has been bad but more disappointing in a way. We arrived several hours later then planned because we arrived late to the shelter to drop off the dogs. After finally making all of the arrangements to drop them off in the morning Brent and I had to purchase new plane tickets. The total cost of plane tickets for this trip - $2,000. We landed at Port Columbus around 9:30 PM, 5 hours later then originally planned. We got to the hotel where mom met us and helped us get checked in a settled.

On Sunday morning Brent, mom, and I went to church in Delaware. It was a nice change compared to Pinon and Utah, kind of an in between the two. The speakers were wonderful and very uplifting. Brent and my mom headed out for a day on the town where the two of them went to the movies, did a little shopping, and just spent some time together. I went and picked up Emma where we headed to Tau Delta for activation. This is my last time going up to Otterbein and to the TD house. Unlike some people in my life, I am really good about separating ties when I feel no need to have certain people or things in my life. With the rest of my pledge class graduating at the end of the year I see no need to return anymore.

Monday was very hectic. Brent, Emma, and I went to campus where we met up with some old friends and teachers. Afterward we headed down to Stantons sheet music to make a list of music. I was slightly overwhelmed and ended up not getting anything accomplished I needed to. Brent purchased a beautiful snow globe for me of a music note and a flute, I love it. It also plays the theme from Mozart's 'The Magic Flute.' We then went to lunch and took Emma home. Monday night was also my baby shower. We headed over to Grandma Miller's house to pick her up and chill until we had to head down. The first words out of my grandmother's mouth were 'You don't look pregnant, just fat.' Thanks grandma. We then headed down to the baby shower in Mt. Sterling. I dropped Brent with dad and Nick for the night. The party was really fun. Xander officially has more clothes than I ever will in my life. At the party everyone started asking how many kids Brent and I want to have. Realistically, we have talked about four and then waiting to see what happens. Grandma laughed. Later in the car that evening I asked grandma about her comment. She said I was too type A to have children. She believes that my stress and anxiety are too high to be a good mother and that I should reconsider having kids. For the first time through this whole pregnancy I actually believed her. Of course I'm nervous, of course I'm scared, but I actually do not know if I can be a mom. Maybe my stress and anxiety are too high. Maybe I don't know what I'm doing. But lets just say that my depression is back.

Tuesday was the fun day. Brent and I slept in for awhile. We then went to lunch with grandma downtown in German Village. Brent has never had REAL German food. He really enjoyed it. That evening we went bowling with the entire family. After bowling Brent and I went dancing downtown at the Hillel, the Jewish Community Center at OSU. Brent was so brave and danced every single dance. I spent most of the time talking to Neev, a life long friend since middle school. He and I are really close and I am grateful to have a friend like him in my life.

Before we knew it was Wednesday. Brent and I slept in and went to look at some of the sites around town. We went to Delaware and looked at several of the historical markers, after wards we headed to Columbus to see the temple, then to Dublin to see the frog and the field of corn. We then met up with Mom and work to see some of her close friends. Brent and I then headed down to Once Upon A Child were spent more money on Xander, but I bought my stroller for $40. Brent bought me beautiful flowers which made me cry. We then turned in the car and were at the beckon call of ever other driver in town. We met up with Grandma and Grandpa at Bob Evans for a small snack and then headed up to the hotel. The entire family met up for dinner last night where Brent and I treated. It was a nice time, and honestly, it put some things in perspective.

Today is Thanksgiving Day. One year ago I lost my grandfather to cancer, I met my future family, and was baptized into the LDS Church by my soon to be husband. So much has changed, except for my feelings about my family. I love my family and always will but with everyone back together again I still feel like an outcast. I am the crazy child who moved away to Arizona, who met a man and fell in love, got married, and got pregnant, I'm the crazy one who converted religions, and I still feel looked down upon. My family still picks on me and I have realized that I either take it and then feel horrible about myself or I pick back because I do not want to listen to it anymore. There is no making anyone happy in this family, I have honestly given up. I realized I moved away from Ohio because I hated feeling like this. I love and miss my Grandma and Grandpa Segers, my mom more than words can describe, and my dad some days of the month, but for the most part I have no desire to visit Ohio anymore. Maybe I can convince Brent to spend next Christmas in Florida or Hawaii with mom.

I think part of the other reason I feel this way is because we have spent so much time with Brent's family over the holidays that I do not know how I feel around my own family anymore. I have spent every major holiday with his family during the past several year. Brent has not really changed on this trip, but is not my energetic husband. I have spent more time this trip making sure he is ok then having fun. I just want to make sure that he is happy and I do not know how he is, I feel like my husband has stopped talking to me, and it just makes me feel like I am losing him again. I know Brent loves me but sometimes I just want him to talk to me instead of just shutting down, it makes me scared and unsettled.

One Year Later

MILLER George W. Miller III, MSgt USAF, Retired, Columbus, OH, passed away on Thursday, November 18, 2010 from cancer. Born July 22, 1942, in Jacksonville, FL. He is survived by his wife of 46 years, Louann Hoyt Miller; son, George W. (Donna) Miller IV, Mt. Sterling, OH; daughter, Nicole (Timothy) Montoney, Columbus; and the joys of his life, grandchildren, Pamela Miller of Pinon, AZ and Malcolm Montoney of Columbus. Also surviving are sisters, Barbara (Tony) Kurtz, Lake City, FL, Nancy (Burton) Pierce and Martha (Rob) Trice of Jacksonville, FL, and Bonnie (Tony) Graupp of Hendersonville, NC; in-laws, Dennis (Carol) Hoyt and Joanne Hoyt, Columbus Grove, Richard (Marie) Hoyt and Shirley (Alvin) Duling, Ottawa, OH, John (Virginia) Hoyt, Renick, WV, Geraldine Lauer, Van Buren, OH, Charles (Laura) Hoyt, Ruskin, FL, Janet (Bob) Westerman, IN, and Patricia (Dennis) Pollock, Middle Point, OH; many nieces and nephews; Pamela's mother, Jane Miller of Dublin OH; and exchange students, Gunda Werner-Burggraf of Germany and Alex Guzman of Japan. Predeceased by parents George and Martha Miller, in-laws Charles and Dorothea Hoyt, and several family members including goddaughter Stephanie Pollock. George was active with church and community organizations. He was particularly proud of his service with the HOPE Council in San Vito dei Normanni, Italy. His most notable hobby was collecting Elvis albums. He entered the AF in 1960 as a non-Morse intercept operator in AF Security Services. He met his sweetheart at a dance at Lockbourne AFB OH in 1963 and subjected her to 13 moves that included 9 years in San Vito, Italy (as he always said, "someone had to drink the wine and eat the cheese"), before retiring from Strategic Air Command as a Manpower Management Superintendent in 1981, having served 21 years, 3 months, 14 days, 8 hours and 45 minutes (and enjoying every minute). During his AF career, he received numerous commendations including the AF Good Conduct Medal, National Defense Service Medal, AF Commendation Medal with 3 Oak Leaf Clusters, and Joint Service Commendation Medal for his work as an intelligence collection manager with the NSA. He began his second career in 1981 when he joined Butler Animal Health Supply, Dublin OH, and retired in 2009 as Manager of Regulatory Affairs. Again, he was rewarded with many managerial awards during his tenure. George was nationally recognized in the veterinary industry as the expert on controlled substance and food and drug regulations and presented more than 300 seminars nationwide

Almost Home

In two short days I will be home in Ohio for the first time since February. So much has changed since then and I cannot wait to spend that time with my friends and family.

Brent and me have a full schedule in Ohio. We arrive on Saturday afternoon and are planning on spending the evening relaxing with family. I might make a quick stop up at the sorority house to see how "Hell Night" is going. On Sunday we are going to church and then breakfast with my mom. The remainder of Saturday will be spent with the sorority for activation and dinner. On Monday Brent, Emma, and I are going to meet up at Otterbein to see some people and hang-out for a little while. Afterward we are going to head downtown to go to Stantons Sheet Music to buy a bunch of stuff (on our district of course). That evening Brent is going to chill with my mom at home while I go to a baby shower by my step-mom. Tuesday we are going to my favorite restaurant in the city, Schmidt's, with Grandma Miller. That evening we are going to the zoo lights with the rest of the family. Wednesday is a relaxing day. My other grandparents will be arriving into town that night for Thanksgiving. Thursday, TURKEY TURKEY, will be spent with my mom and family. I am so excited for Brent to meet my cousin Rayne. I haven't seen Rayne in a few years so this will be a family reunion to remember. Friday we are spending with my dad's family. And then on Saturday we are coming back to Arizona. What a week!